I’m scared, it’s so stormy outside and I need to sleep. Tomorrow I will be back at the kindergarten which I’m looking so forward to, children always make me happy.
Today me and my dad made ginger breads and it tasted so good, then we sat and drank hot chocolate (with my mom too). Now I’m back in my apartment in Varberg. And I realized that I need to clean the house since I found some hair on the floor in the bathroom. I like to have my own apartment even though I have much responsibility, because it’s like I’m older now… I have grown up.. For real.
I know that the song is about abortion but it makes me think about adoption. How the mother must feel after she has given the child away or the questions you as adoptee have. I knew for a very long time that I had a brother who was five years older than me, I started to fantasize about him. What he would do to protect me when I was hurt by a friend or when a guy didn’t treat me good. I made up my imaginary brother during ten years. When I finally found out who he actually was, he was actually much better than what I’ve imagined.
I remember when I was going to the airport last year and he asked the driver if we looked alike and the driver said “Yeah you look very alike!” and my brother told him the whole story to him with a very proud voice, and I smiled through my tears because even though I was going to leave him, I knew he loved me.
I actually thought I could make a video for the blog, but my voice doesn’t sound good at all since I’ve been sick this week. Now I feel better but my voice isn’t better. So I guess I need to make a video later this week, like a christmas video or something. I don’t know what to write since I’ve been busy being ill. Next week is a winter party at the school and I’m looking forward to it so much except that I need to buy a dress. And since I don’t feel very good I haven’t felt good enough to buy a dress today so I hope I will feel better tomorrow.
I’m so upset but I’m trying to not think about it. I had a friend… we were so good friends, we talked about everything. Then he came to my town and stayed here for like three days. I thought we had a good time but something changed because since then he has ignored me. One of my friends said “but let it go, don’t waste your time at him”. But still I can’t let it go, I want to tell him everything fun that happens in my life, I want him to give me advice etc.. I miss him a lot.
People say you can’t buy love, I say that’s wrong because I got this subscription on chocolate by my brother, and I got the first chocolate today and I’m so happy. He knows me too good when he knows that chocolate can make me so happy. He is very awesome in many other ways too, he makes me remember how much I love him when he gives me chocolate ❤️
And I’m talking about my brother Oscar Adalberto Alexander 🌹
She is so beautiful on every picture of her. If you just see her you can’t believe she’s a mother of five children and that the oldest one is 25. I’m proud of having her as one of my mothers ❤️
I was ill, I woke up yesterday and couldn’t almost breath, that was thanks because of the children in the kindergarten, now I feel better, I feel good enough to sing and have my friend over for a visit. But the teacher at the kindergarten said that I need to be 100% alright to go back. And now I start to ask myself, do I feel good? Because I don’t want to sit in the apartment anymore I want to feel good!!!