Social anxiety

What does it called when you fear for meeting people you don’t know and feel people staring at you when you’re going through the city where there are a bunch of people?

Two years ago. It was summer and I was invited to a gathering on the cliffs. I was nervous for many reasons but one of them was the fact that I didn’t know any of those people. I felt misplaced and insecure. I had some wine, I drank so this anxiety of being with people I didn’t knew would disappear. I drank and I drank, suddenly there was no wine left. The next I remember is that I couldn’t come in to any pub or nightclub. I went home. I forgot the security code to the house, I couldn’t find my keys. The next day I woke up in my bed and I felt so confused and disappointed, the evening should have been funnier if I remembered it.

Nowadays I don’t drink that much and I don’t party with people I don’t know.

I still have that anxiety of being with people I don’t know and I need to fix that. I start to cry when many people I don’t know start to talk with each other. I feel misplaced and lonely. That’s not shyness, that is social anxiety.

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Author: Ebba Katherine

My name is Ebba Katherine, I was born in Colombia 1995, I'm writing about my life as adopted with two families.

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